What exactly does Peer Pressure look like?

Phumlani Kango explains why our parents warned us about peer pressure from a young age

When we are born, our parents teach us the difference between right and wrong but as we navigate our way in the world we encounter obstacles and people that challenge these teachings from home.

The majority of us grew up with our parents warning us against peer pressure. How many times did we hear statements like “Just because your friends are doing it does not mean you should., Would you jump in the fire if they did?” As well as this, how many of us actually took the time to ask and define, “what is peer pressure?” It’s exactly what the words suggest and it involves being pressured by your peers to do something in order to be like them or to feel like you’re part of them.

In Episode 5 of MTV Shuga Naija, we see Diana convincing her friends to go to her boyfriend Chike’s party, even though most of them are underage. The consequence of this is that Frances has her drink spiked and ends up passing out at the party.

While this is happening, the other girls escape from a group of guys who are trying to harass them inside the party. Some of the girls had already expressed how they were uncomfortable about going out, even while they were at the club, but Diana convinced them otherwise. This is just one example of how peer pressure can play out.

We are all really worried about Frances, who is nowhere to be found, but Diana is still bragging about the party! Did you see the cold shoulder that Simi and Cynthia gave her? #MTVShugaNaija pic.twitter.com/XR4tz8g5mF

— MTV Shuga (@MTVShuga) April 10, 2018

We all have people whom we cannot say no to and these are people who are usually in our immediate circles, such as close friends. Sometimes it doesn’t even feel like peer pressure, because subconsciously you convince yourself that it’s okay to go to the party because your friends are going as well.

Even thinking about going to a party simply because your friends are going is an example of peer pressure as opposed to you wanting to go the party because you really want to go. This shows us that peer pressure sometimes does not have to be verbal, because if our actions are influenced by those of our friends, then we need to take a step back and look at ourselves.

Our peers influence us both negatively and positively at any age. Sometimes we might take on new sports or new hobbies that we end up excelling at thanks to our friends’ influence.

For most of us while growing up, school and other activities took us away from home; we would spend more time with our friends than we would with our families. As we became more independent, our peers started to play an even greater role in our lives, as we started relying on them for advice during uncertain times.

In emotional situations, like when dealing with a partner who is pushing you to have sex with them or when a friend (like Diana) bullies you into dating someone when you’re not ready, peer influence can be hard to resist. It really has become “pressure”—and you may feel compelled to do something you’re uncomfortable with because someone (or some people) who you hold in high regard are either doing it or forcing you to do it. They threaten to stop being friends with you and they call you names because you refused to cave into their pressure.

One thing you will be grateful for later in life is that you stood your ground. You may find that you won’t be easily persuaded in future, especially when something goes against what you stand for. Withstanding peer pressure helps you grow in character and become more confident in your decisions. On top of all that, you won’t need anyone to validate anything you do because you will be doing it out of your own will.

Have you ever found yourself in a situation because of peer pressure? Share your thoughts in the comments section below!