Can we see February 14th as what it truly is – A very regular Wednesday?
Don’t get me wrong, I have nothing against being head over heels in love or doing cute little things for that special someone dear to your heart.
In fact, I love love!
But isn’t it weird that we channel all the love that should be enjoyed all year round into specific days?
I have had really sad, dramatic and somewhat hilarious Valentine experiences. Looking back at it now, I think I just had expectations that were never even close to being met. These were very basic expectations, by the way. It’s safe to say that these experiences give us a chance to reevaluate and unlearn what we thought was the norm.
Throughout my childhood, I read a little over fifty books and 70% of those were romance novels (don’t judge a sister). Mills and Boons, Harlequin Romance and what not would make you believe life is some sort of fairytale and somehow, on Valentine’s Day, prince charming would come sweep you off your feet with a big bouquet of red and white roses, kisses, take you to a sea side dinner while you stare deeply into each other’s eyes and for some, maybe end the day with intense sexual healing.
What if none of those things happen? What if your partner is caught up with a pile of work on the 14th? What if he/ she is too broke to buy you anything? I mean, everyone’s still recovering from January and its one million long days.
What if your partner doesn’t even believe in Valentine’s Day? OH, THE MOST HILARIOUS!
Why do we stress ourselves so much?
You see, there are societal expectations of love and romance. We have attached more value to things than people, debasing the entire concept of love. Buying expensive gifts, spending a ridiculous amount of money, etc. If those expectations aren’t met, we feel like we aren’t so special anyway and we deserve way better. Sometimes, this is true. But do you honestly think it is wise to use the events of just one day of the year as a test of love?
I’ve been in super awkward situations where at the end of the whole Valentine’s Day craze, I end up being the only one in the midst of all my friends without a gift. Actually, it happened on several occasions. Of course, I didn’t feel good about it, but I never pressured whoever it is I was dating at the time to get me anything, even if my friends looked at me weird. Some people don’t get the idea of romantic gestures on just one day of the year. They aren’t wired that way, maybe they even have horrible memories associated with that day, just like me.
The single ones have it worse. Valentine’s Day is a total nightmare for those who aren’t in relationships. Lovers around you going on dates with cute photos and captions on their social media feeds… Oh what a time to be alive! Your need for attention, desire to be loved and the sudden hunger for a box of red velvet cake shouldn’t dominate your life or lead you to making unreasonable decisions.
The tradition of love should never be limited to one day. It can’t always come with material things. Valentine's Day should never be a yardstick to measure the degree of love any one has for you. For what it's worth, it should an icing on the cake not the cake itself. Stop putting yourself under intense pressure and just go with the flow.
Love is to be experienced all year round.